What Kind Of Newspaper Are You Running? Pt. 3
Day 463, 12:30
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Published in USA 
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by
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by Hari Michaelson
---Letter From The Editor---
Believe it or not this is the last piece in this series. So enjoy bitches. It's a celebration.
- Editor-on-the-Edge
Hari Michaelson
---
The Get Your RL Out of My eRep
Description: For some reason, the editors of these papers just don't "get it", as the kids put it these days. Whether it's reporting on real world events, talking about real world entertainment, or aruging using real world ideals, these paper make eRep players grind their teeth with every non-game-related sentence they read.
Exemplary Examples: Thankfully, these kinds of papers are rarely voted up, and are normally banished to the realm of unloved articles.
Your Allies: The 7 people who agree with you and are willing to overlook the fact that none of what you just wrote has anything to do with the game.
Your Enemies: Everyone not listed above.
Remedy?: It's pretty much gut-check time if you realize this is you. You can either choose to accept the fact that we care more about arguing about our fake money than the real world, or you can choose to continue to be ignored. And probably loathed too.
The Number Cruncher
Description: The Number Cruncher takes a dizzying array of figures, facts, and projections, and flips them into data that the average reader can understand. As a bonus, this data is usually presented in a colorful and fun-filled graph or pie chart. And who can say no to pie?
Exemplary Examples: The Eye of Providence, GNN
Your Allies: Graphs; Charts; Calculators; People who are too lazy to check your math
Your Enemies: People who are too lazy to care
Remedy?: None needed, so long as your calculations are correct. Reporting in that the eUS government has 2,000 extra gold in the treasury can leave you red-faced when it turns out you were only off by a couple of decimal places.
The Michael Lewis
Description: If you aren't laughing by now, just skip this part.
Exemplary Examples: Do I even need to say it?
Your Allies: People with a good sense of humor
Your Enemies: People with a good sense of humor
Remedy?: Economic stimulus package.
---
The Muckracker: If you worked here, you'd be sterile by now.
Believe it or not this is the last piece in this series. So enjoy bitches. It's a celebration.
- Editor-on-the-Edge
Hari Michaelson
---
The Get Your RL Out of My eRep
Description: For some reason, the editors of these papers just don't "get it", as the kids put it these days. Whether it's reporting on real world events, talking about real world entertainment, or aruging using real world ideals, these paper make eRep players grind their teeth with every non-game-related sentence they read.
Exemplary Examples: Thankfully, these kinds of papers are rarely voted up, and are normally banished to the realm of unloved articles.
Your Allies: The 7 people who agree with you and are willing to overlook the fact that none of what you just wrote has anything to do with the game.
Your Enemies: Everyone not listed above.
Remedy?: It's pretty much gut-check time if you realize this is you. You can either choose to accept the fact that we care more about arguing about our fake money than the real world, or you can choose to continue to be ignored. And probably loathed too.
The Number Cruncher
Description: The Number Cruncher takes a dizzying array of figures, facts, and projections, and flips them into data that the average reader can understand. As a bonus, this data is usually presented in a colorful and fun-filled graph or pie chart. And who can say no to pie?
Exemplary Examples: The Eye of Providence, GNN
Your Allies: Graphs; Charts; Calculators; People who are too lazy to check your math
Your Enemies: People who are too lazy to care
Remedy?: None needed, so long as your calculations are correct. Reporting in that the eUS government has 2,000 extra gold in the treasury can leave you red-faced when it turns out you were only off by a couple of decimal places.
The Michael Lewis
Description: If you aren't laughing by now, just skip this part.
Exemplary Examples: Do I even need to say it?
Your Allies: People with a good sense of humor
Your Enemies: People with a good sense of humor
Remedy?: Economic stimulus package.
---
The Muckracker: If you worked here, you'd be sterile by now.
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Comments
I don't think I've laughed this hard in a while.. XD
The Michael Lewis was about the third one I thought up, but I knew I had to save it for the last one.
That Michael Lewis dude is... special...
The scary thing is that Michael Lewis is actually winning in the Congressional elections in Oregon. Nice article too.
Nice series Hari
Thanks Neil and Fro.
Mmm I'm having trouble deciding where Order 66 goes. Maybe it's so awesome and great it doesn’t fit into any of the normal categories 🙂
If you don't know where it goes, it's probably Michael Lewis...