Join the new world

^{Approximate translation of lyrics...}





The only thing we have to fear is fear itself. And boredom. And the fear of the players. And the fear of the players' happiness.

Half-a-score and six years ago Admin brought forth, on this browser, a new game, conceived in way too many glasses of țuică and dedicated to the proposition that most players will put up with almost anything if you let them cheat a little bit.

Now we are engaged in a great decline, testing whether this community of players so conceived, can long endure. We are met on a great existential crisis, testing whether we can survive so much as whether we can thrive.

The brave players who have arrived at this tumultuous point stand on consecrated pixels, reflecting upon the ghosts of the heroic e-dead whose memory consecrates our friends lists.

It is for us the living players to be dedicated here to the unfinished great work. We must take increased devotion to that cause for which they gave the last full measure of their patience. We are resolved to keep the faith of the players and the faith of the players' happiness.

That those who have passed through here shall not have logged out for the last time in vain. That this nation, under a great Dog brought forth by none other than the SFP, shall have a new birth of freedom, of joy, of happiness -- and that the government of the players, by the players, for the players, shall not perish from this e-earth.




Some modest proposals...



I. Make Illegal Immigration Impossible

Let freedom ring! Do away with all restrictions and reviews of citizenship applications. Go strictly by the game mechanic. If you're in Congress, you can approve a citizenship application. Period. End of story. No forms to fill out. No paperwork to sign. No questions asked. No appeals. No political intimidation. No political pressure. No political confrontation. No political screaming. No political slogans. No political speeches. No political jokes. No political rants. No political slurs. No political abuse. If someone wants in, let 'em in. If someone doesn't want in, let 'em out. If someone wants to stay in, let 'em stay in.

I mean, really, who gives a shit?



II. Make e-America Bark Again

The current Presidential system is a meaningless circus of political intimidation, political pressure, political confrontation, political screaming, political slogans, political speeches, political jokes, political rants, political slurs, and political abuse. Ah-ha! Not really. If only! Right? Nah, it's stifling and boring and routine. The Presidency itself means nothing. It's turned into a dull job pushing buttons night and day, just fine-tuning training wars. It's meaningless. It's mind-numbing. It's dog work.

The gnomes of Telegram have determined that there should be no fun, no drama, no excitement, no frivolity, no gaming, no games, no entertainment, no nothing like that from here on out. The gnomes of Telegram have decided that the only things that matter are game mechanics involved in (a) sponsoring tons of training wars and (b) kowtowing to whichever Balkan overlord they're aligning their butts toward this season.

We, on the other hand, we the sub-routine sub-rosa subterreanean homesick faction of the revolutionary committee of the socialist freedom party, have come up with a solution to this and other problems: a dog. To be more specific, a dachshund named Quinzy. Quinzy will be a new account, a new character, a new personality, a new avatar, a new name, a new identity.

And Quinzy will be the new President. Forever. Forever and ever. Amen!



III. Devolve, De-centralize, Re-politicize, Revolve

We'll maintain a central clearinghouse for tax collection and distribution, implmentation of policies as necessary per game mechanics, coordination of some communications and so on. All managed through the good offices of the Dog, Quinzy. The SFP will be responsible for handing out the dog's credentials to whichever federalists are adept at keeping all the country's cash and organizations in their hands for all time.

Then we'll elect The Big Dog, Quinzy, over and over again so we can spend more time playing games and less time worrying about politics.


For the sake of fun, the country will be organized up into five autonomous regions, each one governed by one of the Top Five parties in alliance with whatever military units and sixth parties are most closely allied to that party. Meaning. Each party would propose, direct, and be responsible for enacting and managing, any and all in-game activities it is possible to manage at the State level, including what training wars to manage in their region and what "real wars" or other combat to engage in.

There will be great chaos under heaven. And it will be glorious.




IV. Congressional Oversight

As if! LOL! To keep things simple, each Top Five party will put forward six candidates, of which at least three should be leading members of active militias. Nobody needs to vote except for voters appointed by the SFP Electoral Commission, who will be instructed on who to vote for. If there are any rogue voters, or rogue candidates, then the Socialist Electoral Commission will deploy strategic marxmen to counter-act them in order to preserve the correct order and proportion of representation.

This will make the Congress elections less political, more fun to manage and immune from manipulation and intimidation by bots-men and multi-things.



V. War and Peace

No more fucking alliances. Giant whales with bot armies will be encouraged to form stateless mercenary forces and slaughter the poor and the oppressed wherever they please, or for whoever wants to hire them. Ordinary players, using ordinary in-game communications, will handle foreign relations on an ad hoc basis, for the parties, militias and regions they are responsible for.

If we're lucky, the e-USA will be invaded by a fleet of evil super-humans, or an extraterrestial invasion force, or a fleet of aliens, or a fleet of aliens with a fleet of evil super-humans, thus uniting the e-USA not only across its various divisions but with the rest of the world against a common enemy. Now we're talking real fun. I mean, face it, have you ever had more fun playing this game than when defending the country against invaders. And it's not just fun, it's a lot of fun.

With our New Constitution, chaos will rise to a whole new level. And it will be glorious.




As for the Constitution itself, we will abandon all pretense of legalistic shenanigans and go with a simple, straightforward, unambiguous set of vague, unwritten traditions, a Constitution that is explained in plain English, easily understood by everyone, and just as easily amended whenver the fuck we get too bored with it. Because this is a game, an entertainment, a social experiment,play-acting. We don't need to be lawyers. We don't need to be politicians. We don't need a dictator. We don't need a government except for the most routine things. We don't need to be a dictatorship. We don't need to be a liberal democracy.

A simple set of syndicalist agreements will provide the bones for endless horizons of horizontal autonomy.

Just like dog intended.




Heh!

Visit SFP Headquarters today!: Socialist Freedom Party