Don't YOU Love School? A Few Valuable Elementary Lessons

Day 941, 10:19 • Published in Ireland Ireland • by JGutenberg

Don't YOU love School?

Because I do!

First of all, my favorite subject, Math!

Here's a good problem:

The Irish Freedom Party currently has 147 members + Ronald's 18 deserters and himself.

In the recent party presidential election, there were a total of 83 votes, a presence of 47.16% of however many party members there were when the elections finished.

Were there enough voters who switched over to the IFP to change Ronald O'Reagan's LOSS by 11 votes into a win?

I admit this is a pretty hard problem, you're going to need calculus for this. Luckily, I called in my supercomputer, Bob.

And of course Mr. Einstein to use him:


And 24 hours later I got this result.

NOGOF*CKYOURSELFKTHXBAI

Next is English. Y'know I've been seeing the word PTO flung around a lot, but I don't know what it really means. Let's go look it up using my handy-dandy dictionary:



Pot: 1. An alternate name for marijuana in America, tried by 42% of Americans...(Ahem)

Potty: 1. Where your BS should go, rather than the generally presumed Irish media...

Ah, here we go. PTO: When a highly organized group from a densely populated Country moves into a separate country and gains political power of said country by out numbering other citizens in an election. (Normally the General Election)

Ok, let's give that definition to Bob. Alright, Bob, does a Party Founder winning the election of his party competing against a known multi fall under the category of PTO?

The result, F*CKNOWHATKINDOFRETARDAREYOUASKINGTHE SEQUESTIONS???

Ok, time for Computer Sciences!

I went to MIT and got the computer geeks there to turn this into a really complex equation...



Then I went back and fed it to Bob, and got this result:

Ronald O'Reagan == Fail**(infinity)

~
Enjoy!

Your not-so-friendly neighborhood journalist, J. Gutenberg
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