[BGBW] EMERGENCY! CHEMICAL SPILL IN PUNJAB!
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by BGBW
I regret to inform you that the highly trained Elite Beat Agents have discovered that terrorists have spilt a chemical substance in the Red Light District of Punjab. Fortunately there have been no reported deaths, but a few poor Pakistanis have been confirmed to have been contaminated. They are said to be currently stable.
One vat of the chemical substance that hit Punjab today.
Health Officials have warned that under no circumstance should citizens venture to this part of town and recommend that they seek the Blue Light District as a safer alternative.
Top Pakistani scientists issued a statement earlier this evening to say they have discovered the substance originates from the US, but they did not reveal to why this attack may have occurred and who may have conducted the attacks. However they did say they have found how to combat the mess and expect the situation to be resolved by Saturday. Good news indeed as the long awaited Heart and Soul festival is coming to town this Sunday and I have been told there are many who are eager to attend.
If you have any information about the attack please call your local police who will forward the information to the right troubles.
If you feel you may have been affected by the attack please call for your local Medic.
Till next time, Dio bless.
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Comments
-oshi
Contain it, and use it in the Captain Sam trial.
DOKTOR!
I might have some info related to this issue. I spotted a couple of pigs lurking around the Red Light District. May Dio protect us from further piggish terrorist attacks.
I saw a pig-like man on the way to the red light district, I thought nothing of it though and proceeded to urinate on a pubescent swedish boy.
gross
An eyewitness account states that the perpetrator was a Canadian with a silly haircut. Our initial investigation led us to believe that the terrorist was Jim Carrey.
NOT THE BACONNAISE
I thought I saw Captain Sam going towards the Red Light District, I assumed he was being asscorted by Invisbles to the his holding cell.
Update: A shipment of this hazardous chemical has been intercepted at the AgentChieftain International Airport in Islamabad. Customs has confiscated these goods and is holding it in evidence for the trial of Captain Sam.
WTF is this about?