Principes de Guillotine - Book of Rouge - Chapter 2

Day 1,582, 15:10 • Published in Switzerland Switzerland • by Monsieur Guillontine






Chapter 2 – Blood and Wine


It was a dark day. He had not blessed the people of Paris with His holy light. The filthy peasants had just awoken to the cry of the courier. Pompously he said, “Hear ye, hear ye! His Majesty King Louis XVI shall arrive at high noon this day. It is expected that all faithful servants and laborers of His Majesty shall offer him gifts. Those who do not graciously present His Majesty with offerings shall be put to death by a burning stake! That is all.”

And with that, the poor of Paris toiled through the streets of the capital, laboring to put together a small gift for His Majesty. Standing by the street, the local wine shop owner, Monsieur Guépards, asked, “Why is it that this King robs his people? Why is it that this King oppresses his people? I will tell you why. Because he must be killed!” Concluding his declaration, Monsieur Guépards angrily dropped a wine cask.

Little puddles of dark wine soon emerged throughout the cobble-stoned street. With the shattering of the wine cask, thirsty peasants clamored to scoop and sip some of the wine.

His Majesty King Louis XVI soon arrived, and Monsieur Guépards was the first to greet him. When the monarch asked for his offering, Monsieur Guépards, repulsed by the man’s arrogance, replied, “And why do you desire to take from those who have nothing? What more do you need?” Monsieur Guépards spit into the King’s face.

King Louis XVI, angered by such insolence, exclaimed, “You fool, how dare you! Must you be taught a lesson?”

But before the king could say more, an infuriated mob had already surrounded the extravagant carriage, shouting, “Death to the King! Death to the Tyrant!” Removing him from his carriage, the peasants threw him upon the rough, jagged stones of the street.

At this time, as always since the beginning of time, His Holiness was watching, up above. Sympathy for the poor soon struck Him. And because of this, He, with all His compassion, drew a drop of blood from Himself, and created a guillotine. With this, he placed it upon the crowded street.

The people observed the guillotine, standing alone with its sharp steel blade. With a barbaric cry, Monsieur Guépards forced the monarch upon the guillotine, and with a swift pulling of the string, King Louis XVI was beheaded in front of hundreds of angry peasants.

The people of Paris were now set free. But it was because of Him. Monsieur Guépards thanked Him, and told all the peasants to appreciate Him as well: “He has given us this great tool to slay the enemy of liberty. He is the reason our chains of bondage have been cut. He is the reason for our existence! Bless His Holiness, Monsieur Baguette, God of Gods!” With a joyful cheer from the mob, Monsieur Guépards along with His Holiness were praised.

Monsieur Guépards now understood why his name was Sainte Guépards, meaning Holy Cheetah. It was because He had given him a mission. A mission to reveal to the world the divine generosity of His Holiness. Monsieur Guépards decided it was time to serve His Holines. And so, with the poor of Paris, Monsieur Guépards travelled to the high mountains of the Alps and founded the holy city of Geneva, constructing the Holy Church of Guillotine. From then on, Monsieur Guépards was known as Archbishop Sainte Guépards of Geneva.

Now, all could then worship His Holiness. All could become devout Guillotinists. All could be able to listen to His wise words.



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Yours Truly,
Monsieur Guillontine
His Holiness, Monsieur Baguette, God of Gods