Join the new world

The following text may or may not make sense, I am sick and am on a multitude of medicines.

About a month and a half ago, when ONE began powerfully thrusting into us, I saw something no man, woman, or child should ever have to see. I saw Pizza the Hut in a banana hammock(Jon Malcom is the only man who can wear a banana hammock and get away with it.) The scary part wasn't that we were getting tore a new one, nor was it the fact that we may wipe.

No. The scariest part was having my throat choked inbetween a set of the HAIREST LEGS I HAVE EVER HAD THE DISPLEASURE OF HAVING MY HEAD IN BETWEEN.

Don't get it twisted, it was a guy...I think.

Soon after experiencing the bad touch, I found myself locked up in an abandoned Q1 hospital with UHRIVENTIS. We survived. Mostly because:

A. Q1 hospitals suck, lols.
B. Everyone of them was in tank and they were all headed for Texas.
C. Every time someone aske😛 "Is someone here?" We stayed quiet until Uhriventis yelle😛 "NO, NOW GET THE $^@# OUT."

QUICK NOTE: By survived, I meant, we didn't die. We were, however, exposed to loud polka music, week old satay, and were forced to endure their horrible, horrible odor. (THEY DIDN'T SMELL LIKE BURGERS, FRIES, OR FREEDOM!)



All of this meant that I, like many other people in our country, was unable to run for congress. But, I will let it be known now. I WILL RUN FOR CONGRESS THIS UP COMING MONTH. So if you like me, vote for me and get this article out there.

If you don't like me, $^#@ YOU NICE CHUTLEY.

MIND-TAKING!



On a more serious note, Mr. Marc Aldrix has been doing some amazing things. What he does is he analyzes and compiles the 300 reports you threw on his desk and makes graphs. Amazed? You should be! Not only does he do what you've told him to do, he does it with a smile! AND HE DOESN'T HAVE THE RABIES. What more can you ask for?



WHO THE SHITE DOESN'T LIKE GRAPHS?! He has been a bit overlooked, but you can change that! Post the link to his articles on your shouts! If you do that, I'll buy you $40 worth of Domino's pizza ($@ PtH. :I)

NOTE: By graphs, I mean word graphs. The actual graphical part is done by your mind. NOTE INSIDE A NOTE: You can only do that if you're a mind taker, like myself.



ON A MORE SERIOUS NOTE, the following are articles that I have read more than 3 times today(I like to stroke my e-bone.)



MARC ALDRIX, MAN OF THE HOUR!

Anatomy of a quit, by Gnilraps

Interview with Congressman Speedcat Mcnasty, by Portcolumbus

The Wish: A New Way to Look at Anything, by Agent Washington

Are you an Awesome Possum? By Paul Proteus

As always, America.

DISREGARD FEMALES, ACQUIRE CURRENCY.


- Tendou o7