Decree #4 - Imperial Appointment

Day 3,698, 10:00 • Published in Bulgaria Turkey • by Walpole

[ TURKCE METIN EN ALTTA KANKILER. ]


Dear Bulgurs,

Behold, another imperial decree FYI.




ENGLISH TEXT:
Our beloved Bulgur subjects, whose unregretful willfulness coupled with boundless naiveté is a source of joy and entertainment to all our citizens across our empire.
We as your sovereign lord congratulate the completion of 2 weeks of your subjugation under our domination.
As you, our loyal subjects, might be aware, though you are under our rule, you are supposed to vote in tomorrow’s election.
“What a nonsense for us to vote” you would say, and we would completely concur with thee.
Yet the rules are rules, traditions are traditions. And, Plato is the top doug around here, isn’t he?
Within the framework of the general principles, that we declared in our previous decree, on whom you Bulgurs should vote, our imperial council has undertaken deliberations in detail.
We are happy to announce unanimous decision of our imperial council that we hereby declare our loyal subject Morrpheus to be this month’s governor-general of six ex-Bulgur provinces under our divinely guided rule.
We congratulate him for this appointment, and we look forward to see his acts and deeds in service to our empire until the end of his tenure, or his impeachment, whichever sooner.
We ask thee, our loyal subjects, to respect our decision and approve his appointment by casting your votes accordingly.
If you fail to vote for our appointed governor general, then vengeance is ours, so is your ass.
Signe😛 Deliormanli



LINGUA FRANCA OF THE EMPIRE VERSION:

Pismanlik nedir bilmez kotu huyluluklari sinirsiz safliklariyla harmanlanmis oldugundan bizlere nese ve eglence kaynagi olan sevgili Bulgur tebamiz.
Sizleri hakimiyetimiz altinda gecirdiginiz surenin 2 haftayi bulmasi sebebiyle hukumdariniz olarak tebrik ederiz.
Siz sadik tebamizin belkide farkina vardigi gibi, hakimiyetimiz altinda olmaniza ragmen yarinki secimlerde oy kulanma hakkina sahipsiniz.
“Oy kullanmak mi, ne sacma” dediginizi duyar gibiyiz, ve sizinle ayni fikirdeyiz.
Lakin kural kuraldir, gelenekse gelenek. Ve, Plato buralarin patronu, oyle degil mi?
Kime oy vermeniz gerektigi konusunda bir onceki fermanimizda cercevesini cizdigimiz prensipler dairesi icinde, imparatorluk hukumetimiz detayli ve kapsamli gorusmeler gerceklestirmistir.
Mutlulukla sizlere bildirmek isteriz ki, imparatorluk hukumetimizin oybirligi ile aldigi kararla sadik tebamiz Morrpheus’u onumuzdeki 1 ay suresince hakimiyetimiz altindaki 6 eski Bulgur vilayetinin genel valisi olarak atamis bulunmaktayiz.
Kendisini bu atama munasabetiyle kutluyor, 1 ay sonuna ya da impeach edilinceye kadar, artik hangisi daha once olursa bekleyip gorecegiz, kendisinin imparatorlugumuza yapacagi hizmetleri sabirsizlikla bekliyoruz.
Siz sadik Bulgur tebamizdan talebimiz, bu atama kararimizi onaylar mahiyette yarinki secimde oy kullanmanizdir.
Eger bu talebimize kulak tikar karsi cikarsaniz, bilin ki intikam hakki bizimdir, tipki kotleriniz gibi.
Vesselam
Imza😃eliormanli


Yours Sincerely,
Walpole


BONUS-1
For photo identification purposes...




BONUS-2:
Aman kahveyi kavururlar...