[Appleby] On the defence of Western Europe

Day 3,319, 07:12 • Published in United Kingdom United Kingdom • by Sir Humphrey Appleby


G’afternoon gents o7,

Been a while since my last article and I’m not particularly well so forgive me if this doesn’t live up to your usual Appleby expectations (rea😛 ***ks off before the end of the sentence). I’d just like to have a few words about our recent campaign against the DON’T CRY FOR ME Argies and where we go in our demeanour internationally from here.

First things first – an apology. I was the solo vote against the war chiefly because I wasn’t sure we’d manage it. Fellow oldfags will no doubt remember the last time we were completely occupied after a heroic liberation attempt of Belgium, and how seriously our community was damaged by a wipe for several months.

However, despite all historical evidence suggesting the contrary, our campaign was an unmitigated success. DON’T CRY FOR ME was systematically expelled from the infinitely smaller and weaker countries of Western Europe, to the point where even the Americans apparently belatedly wanted to join in the fight! Thankfully it looks like our own NE will fail and they will have to lose some of their MPPs if they want to commit.

Questions now arise as to how we cement our relations with some of our newfound friendly neighbours. Western Europe, now again for the first time in quite a while, broadly has mutual defence as a chief interest. This is a stark contrast to most of our existence where we’ve been encircled by numerous rivals, presenting potentially fatal conditions for foreign affairs.

Some will suggest joining Orion would be a permanent solution to this. Personally, I would favour trying to establish a stronger working Convention on Western Europe’s Mutual Defence to affirm we have no territorial ambitions against one another, and automatically band together again should any bully state try romping our way again.

What do you think?


Appleby