[Rylde-DMV3] Two Are Better Than 2.0
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by Xander Kross
This election reminds me of a time not so long ago.
We had a CP who was a Foreign Affairs wunderkind. Such a fine diplomat, he managed to convince his own country it was preferable to let our enemies have free reign over us, and he managed to convey the spirit of obsequiousness and toadyism so well that it became our national identity.
This fine, Presidential specimen of a man was also critical of the "reckless warmongers" who dared to stand up to foreign menaces. Clearly, he informed us, these people had no love for eCanada and were set on a course of utter and total devastation. They could not possibly be trusted with leadership!
And when we came out from under the yoke of his oppressive boredom, destruction is more or less exactly what happened. The world changed the following month, and eCanada was so restless and twitchy after months of playing nice and pretending to be polite that we did something stupid.
Of course you all know that paragon of swarthy sexual charisma of whom I speak...
My first crush ENEMY.
The aftermath of Oinyo's regime of well-intentioned, diplomatic deal-making was a self-destructive war with eUK that resulted in a 3-pronged wipe, which eventually led to a prolonged occupation by our southern neighbours.
It's easy to point fingers and say "well, this man was CP at the time, and this person from that party pushed yon button, and that's what caused all our problems for months!" But the fact is, when that button got pushed, it went to a Congressional vote. And Congress voted it in. eCanada wanted that war. Not just one party, or one person, but all the people who voted YES to that war. That lulzy, fun and ultimately self-destructive war.
And why did we want that war, you ask? Surely it was a dumb move to pull when alliances were shifting, and hindsight tells us we ought to have instead sat on our hands for four more weeks and worked things out with our neighbours and friends!
We wanted that war because sitting on our hands, under Oinyo's banner of friendly, cautious diplomacy, was all we had been doing for months. Political in-fighting was vicious and brutal. We were slavering to fight enemies other than ourselves, which is what happens in eCanada when we are told to sit down, shut up and play nice by our boring, cautious CPs.
Oinyo Dozzer Oinyo
TheSmoke has had an excellent term. The reason for this: FYROM's airstrike and Chile's planned invasion. We fought them off like angry wolverines, and then continued to chase Chile all the hell the way out of Europe. All of which was funded - at least in part - by one particular "reckless warmonger's" War Machine.
Fortunately, during this election we are not coming out of a long, oppressive Oinyo-like reign of tense "sit there and be nice" diplomatic stagnation. TheSmoke should be congratulated for the things he and his cabinet accomplished this term because of that. But if we elect Dozzer_x as our next CP, we are heading directly into one. And that is where trouble begins brewing.
Dozzer is not a terrible fellow. I like to bust Dozzer's chops and argue with him, and I agreed to serve on his silly over-staffed cabinet should he manage to win. He's not a bad guy for a dirty communist hippie. But as a CP, he is Oinyo 2.0.
To the best of my knowledge, he has not responded to Spanish arrogance and dismissiveness by promising to help them with their French homework or making them a YouTube video. To the best of my knowledge, Dozzer has never once made an instructional video on how to make tactical combat pillows. But in terms of policy and anti-war fearmongering, all I see is echoes of Oinyo.
Rylde and DMV3
Can we expect Rylde to be a reckless lunatic charging madly into the fray with no hope of victory or recovery? I do not believe this is the case. Rylde is a leader, and one who makes rational, measured decisions (not always, thank the gods, but often enough) and understands risk. The arrangement between Rylde and McVicker is a good example of Rylde's ability to be reasonable and address what some perceive as a "weakness." We can expect Rylde to be Rylde, and that is one thing he is very, very good at doing.
As for McVicker... my history with him is a matter of public record. We will never be "best bros," because he is an ego-maniac and I have no wish to join his little cult of personality and drink the Kool-Aid. Is he a PTOer? Well, if he is, he was already CP twice, and once before that, so either we are PTOed now and do not realize it, or he is not a PTOer. Probably.
My opinion of him has evolved over the past few months, as we have landed on the same side of a number of issues. I have seen him wield authority in a serious, tough-but-fair manner. He hates hippies nearly as much as I do - he may even claim he hates them more, but he's wrong. And I know he has a long list of international contacts and friends in important places, and has a good head for running Foreign Affairs. The eAmericans will tell their own version of the story for some time to come, but we in eCanada watched as McVicker talked them into walking away from a months-long occupation, with no promises and nothing to show for it but a depleted treasury and tarnished international reputation. That is a thing that happened, and McVicker is the one who made it happen.
Rylde-DMV3. YEAH!
Rylde is going to be Rylde. McVicker is going to be McVicker. The eWorld is going to sit up and take notice, and eCanada is going to move forward into the future with strength, swagger and two swinging pairs of massive brass balls.
Vote Rylde-DMV3. Not Oinyo 2.0.
EVER FORWARD!
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Two is better than 2.0!
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CAT!
I think the cat's name is Willow. Or Willow might have been one of his dogs. I misremember. He had many pets.
The cat contained his imprisoned soul.
Willow is the cat. IIRC Onyx is his puppy.
That's right. Onyx is the Rottweiler. I believe, the last I spoke to him, he was also caring for his lady friend's dog, but I may be misremembering that. Onyx had eaten a piece of metal from his bathtub which had perforated her stomach and she had to get surgery. When we last spoke on IRC, Onyx was recovering fine from that and I think he said she was playing with the other dog. That was months ago and I may be remembering it incorrectly.
Anyway, Willow has made appearances in a number of his videos, but he deleted most of them.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AW3RspM7v9M
klop agrees. \o/
Never said that
Riiiiiiiight. 😉 Never said a thing.
If I were Rylde, I would take issue with being Marty Jannetty in that picture.
I thought that also, but I decided to make McVicker Shawn Michaels. A showboating egomaniac who thinks he is God's gift to everything - seemed a natural connection.
I was going to go with a picture of Macho Man and Hulk Hogan instead, but in the end I went with the tag team with the more evocative costumes.
Dennis isn't your boy toy, Xander. He's my waifu!
You'd best sleep with one eye open tonight..... you are very brave.
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You joke, but I actually have to worry. Any given night he can break into my home and stab me.
I winced at the pictures.
"I winked at the pictures. "
Fixed that for you.
You know you have written quality when you have 16 comments with 6 votes
I don't care if they like it, as long as they have read it and left proof that they have done so. Also, many of the comments are my replies.
Never means anything, as we can all rewrite history however we see fit with few bothering to recall the past accurately and giving credit were credit is due, but Oinyo attempted and succeeded in negotiating with Spain for the release of Canada from the Spanish PTO. The first time, they just jerked us around without any sincere interest in a resolution, the second time a deal was actually struck, but the people of Canada weren't interested in the concessions, as was their choice.
The only war Oinyo entered into was volunteering reinforcement to the USA when their were attacked and ultimately wiped in the hopes of creating better relations with the USA. The war that resulted in the wipe of Canada was well before Oinyo ever first became CP.
As I am sure Oinyo's real life will callously be thrown into the typical venom spewing Xander likes to delude himself into thinking is political discord, it is also a matter of record that all charges against Oinyo were summary dropped. That is, there was absolutely nothing to even take him to court over.
Don't let these facts spoil a good fairy tale though. It is just a game after all. Voted.
Actually, Foxfire, I am in agreement with you. The references to his real-life incident will be deleted. And I will not be using them again.
I only know for sure of the events from last October onwards. Anything before that is only second-hand information, but I remember the scene as it was when I started, because I began writing about it almost immediately, and well before I knew anything about anything. At which point, you called me a multi and accused me of making references to things which a) I still know nothing about and b) I did not actually reference. And then you talked to an imaginary pig. It's all right there in my "back issues."
Correct, the only war Oinyo really involved himself with was bro-fisting our ungrateful neighbours to the south, and the war he declared on the eCanadian heroes and patriots that bravely drove out the ignorant Spaniards he was so eagerly trying to appease.
The war that resulted in the wipe of Canada - the recent one - was immediately after Oinyo's term. The very next term, in fact, which is around the time you and he fled to Ireland together to hide, presumably in shame.
Yes, an MDP member was president at the time, and yes, an MDP member probably did push the "Attack UK" button. But they did it as a result of months of listless boredom and over-caution and actual scolding when any of them did something brave and patriotic. Oinyo may have been charming as a person, but he was timid and weak and concilliatory as a leader. And it drove us to the point that we were willing to risk everything for a little taste of action. And we got that taste, and it cost us plenty. But it did manage to rid us of Oinyo. And you.
Please stay in Ireland.
You mean that time that Oinyo stabbed a Russian diplomat and was later found naked in his apartment? - That time? - Summarily dismissed you say? In Part because the Russian Diplomat got himself out of Canada before he could answer a single question as to what happened.... Did Oinyo ever speak up and explain this entirely ridiculous situation that, in hindsight, really isn't all that surprising given what we witnessed in game?
I love Oinyo... something about playing the game the way it should be played
I'll put this here to balance out the thread against Rolo's usual ignorant comment, then I'll be done with this post.
A very long time ago (before cellphone were common place [yep, that long ago]), I was taking a walk with a girl through a city park. We were crossing a foot bridge, about 150+ metres long and just barely wide enough for a car. I know it was just barely because that night some lunatic decided to drive his sports car across it, nearly killing 15 people. Some people jumped up on the ledge, some fell in the river and I nearly lost the ability to walk with my own legs as I feebly tried to shield the lady I was with from the incoming car, like it would have mattered. The car drove off among screams of people, we brushed ourselves off, I walked the girl home and then headed straight home myself. The very second I got in the door I called the police and gave the license plate that was burned into my mind among the car's lights as it flew at me. When the officer asked when this event happened, I looked at the clock and replied, 45 minutes ago. The officer proceeded to chew me out for not calling right away. He said they would never catch them now and hung up on me. He was absolutely right. I should have found a payphone and called the police right away. That thought also never even entered my mind once. Make sure the girl I was with was safe and then get myself home. That was all I thought before my mind actually started processing the event.
How people respond to traumatic events is rarely ever rational, and typically open to criticism after the fact. Hopefully no one reading this will ever have to learn this for themselves.
v.47/s.80
Sub4Sub
http://www.erepublik.com/uk/newspaper/men-s-magazine-306858/1
All games have Players that know the "Metrics of the Game". In other games, these Players are known as Guild leaders, Economical Savants, PvP Masters, Mentors and just all around Top-Players.
In this game, Rylde is one of those Players. And I don't count the wipe against him. I know I had more fun while wiped than stable - I know I made a shit ton more Gold while wiped too.
A vote for Rylde is never a wasted vote. This is a game after all, whatever is most fun is how its suppose to be done.
Oinyo's doing us proud in prison! YOU GO BRO
\o7
Needs more tactical combat pillows.