[DoD] BALTICS LIBERATED! HUNS ON THE RUN! [DoD]

Day 4,934, 19:34 • Published in USA USA • by USA Department of Defense


EMERGENCY BROADCAST SYSTEM

BALTICS LIBERATED! HUNS ON THE RUN!
WAR AGAINST CODE ENTERS NEW PHASE!

Asteria has made progress in its war against the CODE aggressors. On the USA front, Hungary has been booted from our shores, losing its last region in North America. In Europe, the Baltic states have also been liberated from the jackbooted oppressors.

As you receive your GIMP and FBP payments this week, remember what you should be buying with that money. The only thing any of us ever need to buy: Croatian tears.

EUROPEAN THEATER

While many patriots will be concerned with the home front, this is a global war, and Asteria has made great gains in Northern Europe.

"Asteria has returned the Baltics to the Baltickers," President Vootsman gravely informed the nation this morning.

The situation as it was: Chile and Slovenia were occupying Lithuania and Latvia. CODE had landed in Albania and planned to cut the border with Serbia to prevent Serbia from pushing them back out.

But Asteria forces kept the battle open long enough to get a Declaration of War -- with just three minutes to spare!

"CODE had initially celebrated because they thought they won that battle," the President noted. But you can't celebrate when your face is covered in Croatian tears, as every schoolchild knows.

Serbia booted Albania while Hungary moved on Portugal and Iran. Hungary crashed hard into Portugal's tanks, while the USA and other Asteria allies pursued a coordinated attack in the air.

NORTH AMERICAN THEATER

As Hungary was being simultaneously drained by the barrage of resistance wars in the USA, it was stretched too thin to compete effectively in the Baltic region.

While Hungary did get initiative, the USA defended and went on to win several more resistance wars on its home territory. With final pushes in Virginia, D.C., Florida, and Minnesota, the brutal Hun was banished from our shores.

"We kicked them when they were down," the President said. (Always in strictest observance of the Geneva Convention, of course.)

Congratulations to the nationwide teams of guerillas who put paid to the deranged notion of Budapest on the Potomac.

Croatia and Chile, you're next!

USA REGION CHECK

After being reduced to our last region, we're once again rocking four whole regions! Go out and buy yourself FOUR KFC family buckets to celebrate!

This is America and we're coming back.

XO,
What A Guy
Minister of Defense
Vootsman Coalition Administration of National Unity and
Beloved SFP Chairman