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Hello and welcome to another edition of Dinner & Discussion with Dartreal. I am your host, Dartreal, and I welcome you to my home.

Tonight, I’m proud to present my interview with Newt Gingrich. Newt has established himself in eAustralia as a man who is heavily involved in politics. He has been a Senator of Queensland for six times! Six times! Other achievements in politics he holds include one term as Deputy Speaker, two terms as a Minister of Foreign Affairs, one term as Minister of Immigration, Customs and Security and one term as Minnister of Finance. On top of this he is a current Dropbear and was a former member of the ACUK. Won't you join us for dinner and a bit of discussion eAustralia?



Tonight’s guest: Newt Gingrich.
Tonight’s meal: Pan seared Lemon Chicken with roasted red garlic potatoes and a vegetable medley.
Tonight’s tune: Bach’s “Jesu, meine Freude”.

Dartreal: Newt thanks for joining me for dinner and a discussion.

Newt Gingrich: No problem. I’m free to do this anytime....as long as u pick up the bill. Haha.

Dartreal: Well I do pay for everything my guests request for dinner. Speaking of which, how is dinner to your liking?

Newt Gingrich: The chicken is a little dry but other than that it tastes great, especially the garlic potatoes which are some of my favorite.

Dartreal: Dry chicken? I'll have the chef fired! That's outrageous they did a poor job cooking for someone as decorated as you Newt.

Newt Gingrich: That’s ok, no need to fire the guy. Just send him into eBrazil with nothing but bad food.

Dartreal: Haha! That will show them! Let’s talk about when eBrazil occupied Western Australia and Northern Territory. Many people believe the only good thing about eBrazil holding regions in eAustralia was that we didn’t have to fly to eBrazil to take part in the Carnaval or watch a good game of soccer. What are your thoughts?

Newt Gingrich: Well it depends on what your definition of a good soccer game is, hehe. Australia has qualified for the World Cup so until they are eliminated then I stand behind them.

Dartreal: Backing eAustralia until the end! Bravo sir, I salute your patriotism for our country. Here's a question for you: Why do so many eAmericans move to eAustralia? What is it about this country that is attracting them?

Newt Gingrich: I think it is that eAustralia offers something different than what we have in eAmerica. It is a very calming place and until recently peaceful, which is a nice change of pace. It is also an English speaking country that tends to help.

Dartreal: And we have beautiful women, and men if you swing that eWay!

Newt Gingrich: If u say so but I pass on men. Bring me the ladies.

Dartreal: Me too. And let's make it clear we're not bashing any eMen out there who are attracted to other eMen. Whatever eWay you wanna eSwing is ok with us, right?

Newt Gingrich: Yea I am pretty tolerant of all peoples.



Dartreal: Excellent and that's an eHate crime avoided. Let's talk about how long you've been here for. You've been here a decent amount of time and have done much in politics here. We'll talk about politics later. Would you consider going back to eAmerica now after being in eAustralia for as long as you have?

Newt Gingrich: It has crossed my mind but currently I love eAustralia and I have dedicated my eLife to protecting her and making her a better place. So I think I will stay a while longer.

Dartreal: That's wonderful to hear. Let's talk babies. Did you know all babies are color blind when they are born?

Newt Gingrich: They are? Well I am glad I can see colors now... or at least I think can. Is this wine still red? Haha!

Dartreal: Yes but we have white if you like?

Newt Gingrich: Naa the red is fine I prefer it plus if I have too much I can call a government car to come and get me - the perks are very nice!

Dartreal: What perks would that be?

Newt Gingrich: If I tell you I would have to have ASIO kill you… Hahaha just kidding. Well was in charge of all of eAustralia's finances, but I’m the Deputy Minister of Finance, so I get a big check book plus the government car and we hold several parties out of the Lodge but don't tell Cottus. He is usually out working.

Dartreal: My lips are sealed. Let's talk politics now. You've been senator six times now and that is absolutely amazing. Question: How can someone "draw a blank"?

Newt Gingrich: Blank? I don’t know that term.

Dartreal: To draw a blank, it means you don't have an answer to a question being asked, or you have no response to something. Example: Newt is "drawing a blank" when he was asked how can someone "draw a blank?".

Newt Gingrich: It’s not that hard if you really try it just say a lot of things that not really mean anything add a few big words and praise your country while your doing it.

Dartreal: But how can one "draw a blank" when a blank is just something that isn't there? I believe the real question has been lost in explanation.



Newt Gingrich: Ok that might be my bad.

Dartreal: I guess you could say you're drawing a blank on drawing a blank! Haha!

Newt Gingrich: Haha! I try to say something just looking at people won't make it go away its better to just babble on about something.

Dartreal: And considering your long career in politics you would know a thing or two about babbling... am I right?

Newt Gingrich: I thought about writing a book on it I was gonna title it “How to say nothing by saying everything!” I would sell it to all new Senators after they take office.

Dartreal: I'll be looking forward to reading that should it be published. Let's look at the election you took part in when you ran for ePrime Minister of eAustralia against Cozza and Garven Dreis a month back. You LOST the election in an UPSET. In the end it was between Cozza and Garven while you were NOWHERE TO BE SEEN. You were DEFEATED in the election and you LOST! How did you feel afterwards?

Newt Gingrich: Well after putting it like that… but to be honest I lost to great guys. I am proud of the campaign I ran specially since my campaign, party or I did not do any mudslinging. Would I have been happier if I won? Sure I would but it must not have been my time and trust me but Newt Gingrich will be back bitches!

Dartreal: Would mudslinging have been involved should you have promoted yourself at events involving mud wrestling?

Newt Gingrich: Now that is an interesting thought maybe if I was the one slinging it but if not then I think I am safe.

Dartreal: In your next election will you have public forums at mud wrestling contests?

Newt Gingrich: I think I might look into it but would people wanna hear me talk or watch 2 hotties going at it in the mud? I think I lose to the ladies but it all depends on when I run again I am going to take a hard look at whether to run in January.

Dartreal: Let's say you do run again and promote your campaign via mud wrestling matches. Would you do so running the risk your opponents will accuse you of using "dirty tactics"!? See what I did there!?

Newt Gingrich: Well I hope they would not consider it "dirty tactics." If they did I would get a good chuckle out of it.

Dartreal: If you used mud wrestling I'm pretty sure you'd get more than a "good chuckle" out of it.

Newt Gingrich: That is true.



Dartreal: Well our evening is coming to an end. Would you care for some tea or coffee? Perhaps a little dessert?

Newt Gingrich: Well dessert always sounds like a good idea but I best be getting back and figure out a way to make more money incase those rain forest tree huggers, aka the eBrazilians, attack us again.

Dartreal: Well before you leave on your crusade, let's have ourselves a fun game of Word Association! You ready to play?

Newt Gingrich: Yes I am

Dartreal: I say a word and you say the first thing that pops into your head. Charlie Manson.
Newt Gingrich: Family.

Dartreal: Vegemite Sandwich.
Newt Gingrich: Land Down Under (the Song).

Dartreal: Tony Soprano.
Newt Gingrich: The Boss though sadly he is from New Jersey.

Dartreal: Rainbow unicorns flying through the air.
Newt Gingrich: Elton John's fantasy?

Dartreal: Drawing a blank.
Newt Gingrich: Babble, it's better!

Dartreal: Newt Gingrich.
Newt Gingrich: Great man....or the greatest man?

Dartreal: I’d say greatest but that's just me. And finally, Dartreal.
Newt Gingrich: Nice guy, great interviewer… and even greater for picking up the check, haha!

Dartreal: Haha too kind! Thanks a lot for joining me for dinner and a discussion Newt.

Newt Gingrich: No problem Dartreal. I had a great time, good food and I thank you for your time.

Dartreal: No, thank you!

Newt Gingrich: I do what I can.

Newt Gingrich ladies and gentlemen: a man who might be our ePrime Minister one day. He isn’t going to allow himself to stay down every time he falls. He has done a lot for our eAustralia so far and let’s hope that his passion for the nation is strong and alive within him for a very, very long time. Join me next time for another edition of Dinner & Discussion with Dartreal. Until then I’m Dartreal - dine fine eAustralia.