Q&A of Capitalism

Day 2,054, 20:30 • Published in Australia Australia • by Septimius Maximinus

Question: How will we know when we have true capitalism?
Answer: Corporations will have figured out how to make money, without employing anybody

Question: Could you teach capitalism to tribesmen in the Amazon?
Answer: You could, but what did they ever do to you?

Question: Is it true that under capitalism, every man is free?
Answer: Yes, every man has the freedom to work or starve

Question: Is it true that there is no state repression under capitalism?
Answer: Yes. To repress you, the state would have to care about your existence.

Question: What would happen if you put capitalism on the moon?
Answer: After a while, the moon rocks would try to form a union

Question: Is it true that under capitalism, every vote counts?
Answer: Yes, every board member can vote on whether you'll be laid off

Question: Is it true that capitalist societies don't have a secret police to arrest you at night?
Answer: Yes, the police don't mind being on camera at all

Question: What is the difference between feudalism and capitalism?
Answer: Under capitalism, your labour benefits your boss more than you. Under feudalism, it's the same but you get religious holidays off.
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Story time

One day a boy asked his father, "Daddy, what is capitalism?" His father thought for a moment and said, "Well, let me explain it this way. I go to work every day and make the money - so I am what you call a capitalist. Now your mother takes the money, pays the bills and makes sure everything runs well - so she is the government. We both take care of you, so you would are the people. Your nanny is the working class, because we pay her to work, and your little baby brother is the future."

The boy said, "Okay," and went out to play. Later that night, he woke up to hear the baby crying. He got up and went into the baby's room and found that his diaper was very full. He went into his parent's room, but his mom was sleeping and his dad was missing. He was looking for his dad when he heard sounds from his nanny's room. He tried the door, it was locked and they didn't open the door when he asked them to. When he looked through the keyhole he saw his dad and the nanny together in bed. So, having failed to get help changing the baby's diaper the little boy decided to go back to sleep.

The next morning when the boy woke up he told his father, "Dad, I know what capitalism really means now! Capitalism is when the capitalists screw the working class while the government sleeps, the people are ignored, and the future is in deep sh@#!