Why We're eRep Friends - by Evil Chutley

Day 1,266, 16:12 • Published in USA USA • by Chutley



Why We’re eRep Friends


1. So you can see my shouts. You don’t want to miss them. Here’s an example of something I might shout later: “Evil Chutley discusses why we’re eRep friends.” In fact, you’re probably reading this article right now because I just shouted that exact sentence. What irony. It’s like looking at yourself in the mirror when there’s a mirror behind you and the image goes on infinitely. What’s that you say? It’s not like that at all? I see your point.





2. So I can see your shouts. I really want to know who you support for CP, what citizenship you just got, the fact that you just went up one level, how many hard working medals you have, and that “RL sucks.” Your updates sustain me and I could not go on without them.





3. Because being “friends” on eRep has deep meaning. My eRep friends are sacred to me. You are all in my tight-knit network of souls who understand me both completely and implicitly. Sure, I’ll friend the occasional always stranger just so he or she can be linked to these articles, but don’t let that fool you. I love all seven of you.





4. Because we’re both super popular. I mean, how else did we find each other? Just from clicking on our profiles and pressing that all important “+” sign? Absolutely not. We’re cool. And cool kids hang with the other cool kids.





5. So we can vote and subscribe to each other’s newspapers. Even better, we can comment! Am I flattered that I’ve gotten almost 300 votes between my last three articles? Sure. And am I honored that there were around 80 comments in total? No. That’s 220 votes that were not accompanied by comments. What the hell, man? I commented on your didn’t read your article.





In conclusion, we’re not eRep friends so we can know what the other person actually looks like. Hell, you don’t even know my gender. Like many of you, I thought I was a male, but then it was brought to my attention that when I friend people it says something like: “Chutley wants to add you to her friends list.” I guess you just never know.


On the contrary, we’re eRep friends so we can share our thoughts, stories, and newspaper articles with people with whom we have absolutely no real life connection. I suppose it’s possible that I went to school or worked with one of you at some point, but, not only do I not know that now, I sincerely hope I never do.


You are all avatars and shouts to me, and I wouldn’t have it any other way – unless you haven’t subscribed to this newspaper, in which case I would ask you to change that because, after all, we’re friends.








Your eRep BFF,
Chutley



>> Shout this and let's become friends<<