INANE INTERVIEW WITH PRESIDENTIAL HOPEFUL HENRY ARUNDEL (PFEIFFER)

Day 1,272, 18:04 • Published in USA USA • by Chutley



Disclaimer: The following is the fourth Primitive Thinking Inane Interview with influential eReppers. Hence, it is inane – be warned.







10 Questions With Speaker of the House HENRY ARUNDEL






1. Well it’s obvious where we should start – your avatar. Now, I’m not going to sit here and pretend like I don’t know that’s a porn star, but why don’t you tell us a little about your girl.


Henry Arundel: Deificus (my avatar guru) had a long list of potentials, but none jumped at me, so I spent 10 minutes bouncing around google image search til I discovered Hanna. It's fate, no other avatar girl comes close.


2. On a scale of 1-10, with 1 being the occasional porn watcher and 10 being a guy who might get arrested in the next few years for perverse actions, where do you rank and why?


Henry Arundel: 42. duh, winning.


3. Let’s continue this sexual stuff - you’ve come dangerously close to winning the presidency twice now. I’m assuming you have eRep related blue balls? Do they hurt?


Henry Arundel: My balls are fine, I drain them into the various underlings I have in the Gang of Four.


4. Tell a story about Henry Arundel. Prove he’s better than Pfeiffer.


Henry Arundel: IRL Henry Arundel will be a Duke once his dad dies. In eRep, Henry Arundel is a member of both the Japanese Imperial Family, and the British Royal Family. Pfeiffer was never royal in any way.


5. Tell me a story about this girl.







Henry Arundel: Clearly her parents don't love her, and we really shouldn't rub it in her face.






Prince of Boob


6. You once loaned me gold. You realize I’m not paying you back, right?


Henry Arundel: I already got 6/16 back...I've been ripped off for more before.


7. How freaking delicious are Jelly Bellies?


Henry Arundel: Good, but I prefer Starburst jelly beans.





8. Ask me a question:

Henry Arundel: On a scale of 1-10, how jealous are you that Kara Beth wants to be my First Lady?

Chutley: -42. Duh, losing. I’ll rebound I guess. There are other fish in the “e.”





9. #9 is the serious question: Will you run for POTUS again? If so, what will you do differently to win?


Henry Arundel: Maybe. Probably. I'll do nothing differently. I run my race, and that's that. My opinion on almost everything you could think of has been written down somewhere, so even if I wanted to go full fag and start changing my stances on stuff, I'd get called on it in a heartbeat. Easier to just be the asshole I've always been, and see what happens.


10. Give it your all:


Henry Arundel: No u.

Chutley: Fine, I will.




1. Remember the Alamo? Neither do I. It was way too long ago.

2. My radio is selfish. I always turn it on, but it never does the same for me.

3. You know who else is selfish? Dinner. I mean, breakfast and lunch get along just fine, they even hang out on the weekends and call each other brunch, but dinner never hangs out with anyone.

4. I’m pretty good at push-ups, sit-ups, and pull-ups, but I’m even better at giving-ups.





That’s all I got, Pfeiffer. Thanks for your answers. Oh, and here you go:







Best,
Chutley



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